Tuesday, November 15, 2011

It Don't Come Easy

"It don't come easy, you know it don't come easy. Got to pay your dues if you wanna sing the blues, 'cause you know it don't come easy."

The lyrics above are from a well know rock-and-roll song of the 1970's. The meaning of the lyrics speak to me of living an authentic life. There is no free lunch in the universe; good people are not entitled to better lives. The Divine does not rearrange molecules on demand, and prayer is not an opportunity to submit my Christmas list to my Creator.

Life don't come easy. We push out of our mother's wombs into the cold bright world gasping for air, and so it begins. Yet just because it don't come easy does not mean life needs to be hard. My life is what I make of it. As a co-creator in my life I engage in active imagining of the life I want to experience, and through the power of attraction I draw my desired life to me.

I live in a magical, mythical, mysterious universe on a living planet which brings with it all the necessities for life. The great mystery is evidenced in all the world's creation myths. As a temporary mortal visitor I am blessed with my own unique gifts, talents and skills which allow me to be of service to others. I am an extension of the divine which exists within me and all around me.

The separation that seems to exist between me, you, the moon, and the stars is an illusion. Physicists know that Space is something we really don't yet fully comprehend, and that all of what we see is somewhat distorted; not at all what it appears to be. The relatively recent discovery of Dark Matter poses challenging questions about what we actually know about the amazing, spectacular and complex Universe in which we exist.

As my own insight of the universe evolves and unfolds I am changing the lyrics to my life song from It don't come easy to It comes easy and effortlessly, and it comes beautifully and mysteriously.


True North (Polaris over Hwy 156), #2215-7D

© 2011 James W. Murray, all rights reserved.

(click image for larger version)

Details: October 1, 2011; Canon 7D; f/11 @ 1687 sec; ±0 EV; ISO 250;
Tokina 11-16mm f/2.8 @ 11mm

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Saturday, November 12, 2011

Tickets to the Final Performance

When death comes for you let it find you alive.

Have you been fully living your life?

Are you bored and restless with your current status or situation in relationships with people you say you love?

One can become at once discontented and disconnected to their gracefully given life.

Living is the only significant outcome in life.

Wake up!

We all have an invitation to the banquet of NOW which is the present moment offering unlimited abundance from the Cornacopia of love. Overflowing into our lives are joy, peace, friendship, community, sexual and spiritual ecstasy, and true connection — if we are ready and open.

I have spent the majority of my life running from true connection. I only allowed people into the waiting room of my heart. No one got into the soft center of Me. I was skilled at avoiding and evading intimacy. I was an actress in the play of Love. The drama of pretending has come to my attention, and with that comes acceptance.

Life, unfortunately is terminal. There is a finite amount of time on this lovely spinning magical planet. The body I inhabit has an expiration date. I don't want to leave this life knowing I was capable of full love, but too afraid to experience it.

Today I know Death has my name on the list. I want to be fully alive when death finds me. I want to be living my purpose and radiating love to everyone, including myself, who I come into contact with me in my life.

Don't you?

When Death comes for you let it find you alive.


The Invitation, #3620-7D

© 2011 James W. Murray, all rights reserved.

(click image for larger version)

Details: November 13, 2011; Canon 7D; f/8 @ 1/3 sec; —1 EV; ISO 250; Canon EF 70-300mm f/4-5.6L IS USM @ 150mm

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Sunday, October 23, 2011

Autumnal Equinox

The morning air is crisper and it stays dark until almost seven o'clock in the morning. I feel a strong pull to stay in my bed with the covers pulled up to my chin, warm and safe. I see the trees changing out their wardrobes, as I carry sweaters from one closet to the next. It is definitely becoming Fall. Autumnal Equinox is long past now, and we are into Hallomas. The light is growing longer and our shadows dance on the sidewalks until dinner time.

  • Are you feeling the urge to go inward?
  • To stay home and cook stew?
  • To wear sweaters and leggings and pull out your Uggs?
Yes!!!! Me too. And so is Mother Nature. She prepares herself by deepening the caves and covering the ground. She knows winter is a long siesta for much of the natural world. And while it may seem unproductive, it is essential. The preparation for Spring is happening but in a way that is magical and unseen.

  • How is that true in your own life?
  • What is occurring naturally within you, without a lot of effort and energy?
We are all given this reprieve from daily frenzied activities. Do we pay attention to the inner cycle of life/death/rebirth? Are you aware that you are craving solitude right now? Are you able to slow down and be present to the divine within you? What will you be mulling over in the compost of your internal life this Fall?



Two Bird Sunset, #4878-20D

© 2011 James W. Murray, all rights reserved.

(click image for larger version)

Details: February 16, 2011; Canon 20D; f/14 @ 1/250 sec; ±0 EV; ISO 200;
Canon EF 70-300mm f/4-5.6L IS USM @ 252mm


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Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Fog and Myst

Dreams are soul excursions between twilight and dawn where I enter the collective deep interior with it's vast tunneling pathways leading me into my soul. The images, which can be strange, sacred, and at times scary, are essential opportunities to remember my fate and purpose. Some images lick at my heels like angered flames as I attempt to fly over them without injury. The point is not to avoid being burned; the point of purpose is to accept the invitation rather than avoiding the pain. The fire of purpose never goes out, even as fog or mist dampen the heat. The luminous fire constantly offers the essence of alchemical transformation.

I must be willing to step into the flames.

Mist and fog are elements that may cool the fire and confuse familiar terrain, however my feet know the way. My purpose and fate are embedded in my body. My DNA is encoded with ancestral myth and mysticism, which eternally urges me deeper into living my dream.

I call upon fog and Myst (mist) to cool the fire of my purpose. In Fall and Winter I tend to my hearth with a slow and simple fire. I have had enough of the towering infernos which burn too hot and too bright consuming all my energy. This is the season when fog and mist are welcomed partners. I am aware and I am embracing elemental change.

In the mist and fog I am given more time to contemplate what is emerging in the distance. It is this time between seeing and knowing that I choose to dwell today.



Goddess Sunset, #1040-7D

© 2011 James W. Murray, all rights reserved.

(click image for larger version)

Details: August 12, 2011; Canon 7D; f/8 @ 1/40 sec; —2 EV; ISO 400;
Canon EF 70-300mm f/4-5.6L IS USM @ 135mm


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Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Holding Myself in Grace

Since my last blog entry I have joined the ranks of thousands of Americans, as I returned to therapy. I found a great therapist from a referral of a good friend and ally.

I had been looking. I had been looking for a male therapist. I did not think a woman therapist would be the right fit.

Lo and behold, I was wrong. When the student is ready, the teacher appears.

I am a very good therapist, so I have extremely high expectations of all therapists. Most don't come near meeting my lofty ideals. Most are too "technique" based. What works best for my own therapy is a Jungian/Freudian. What I am best at providing for others is a gestalt/psychodrama/narrative approach.

I believe fully that the mishaps of our early beginnings in life cast long, far-reaching and dark shadows upon our SELF over the course of our lifespans.

My goal for therapy is to stretch my immature underdeveloped SELF into a more reliable and accountable me.

It is not easy pushing mySELF out into the world in ways that purposely make me uncomfortable. I walked into that therapist's office and told her all my deep dark secrets about letting myself off the hook. I explained that I would lie to her when I wanted to take a break and would become defensive when I was afraid. I clearly stated that I would balk at any attempt by her to push me.

She still agreed to take me on.

I think this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship, with mySELF.



Arising Rose, #1487

© 2011 James W. Murray, all rights reserved.

(click image for larger version)

Details: October 6, 2010; Canon 20D; f/8 @ 1/320 sec; —2/3 EV; ISO 400; 100mm.

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Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Loyal Soldier

In the hustle and bustle of everyday living I lose track of the divine in all things. The mundane and familiar can become incidental. The drama of everyday living is so compelling.

I love a good storyline. When I get caught up in the drama of others, I avoid self care. I have been running in my life for so long, I am not if I can stop. I believe I have done this since I was very young. It must have been purposeful, at some point. Now it has become destructive and ineffective. If it was still working, I would not be blogging about it. My tendency to "over do it" has cost me relationships. It has also impacted my integrity because I am less accountable to myself and others when I try to do it all.

I am vivacious and a lover of life. I love to live fully with all senses engaged. I cannot do this every minute of everyday. I t is too much. It is artificial. It no longer serves me.

How does one slow down but stay present and authentic?

How do I remain fully engaged but not continue to be the "little engine that could?"

What will my loyal soldier's next assignment be?



Egret's Egress, #3921

© 2011 James W. Murray, all rights reserved.

(click image for larger version)

Details: February 2, 2011; Canon 20D; f/6.3 @ 1/4016 sec; ±0 EV; ISO 400; 430mm.

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Thursday, March 10, 2011

Spring is Springing

When it rains, it pours.

Usually this is associated with negative outcomes. It rains pain. It rains suffering. It rains something other than sweet cool nourishing life force.

It has been raining in my head lately. I am over-stimulated and overwhelmed with life. Too many things are coming up, and while I know we don't usually get more than we can handle today I feel like, "Hey God, please don't trust me so much . . ."

My parents are needing more and more care and companionship. Trying to handle it from California, New York and Arizona is too much for us now. We have to make big decisions. WOW. Now I know I am grown up. I am making decisions about my parents future. RAIN, RAIN, Go away. Come on back another day.

At least today I have an umbrella of support in my life, people who love me even when I cannot love myself. Some very good friends came to visit me tonight. We laughed about men. We laughed about love. We laughed through our pain and cried from our laughter. We rained joy.

Tomorrow, my plan is to get up and do it over again. With the love and friendships I have in my life today, I know I can weather any storm.

May you stay warm and dry tonight.



Sonora Desert Sunset, #9941

© 2011 James W. Murray, all rights reserved.

(click image for larger version)

Details: February 19, 2011; Canon 20D; f/4 @ 1/500 sec; 1 1/3 EV; ISO 400; 112mm.

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